FAQ & Articles
Q1. What is the difference between coaching, therapy and consulting?
Both disciplines use many of the same tools, yet there are some critical differences in the stances and outcomes desired. Some of the differences and similarities are listed below
| Relationship Coaching | Therapy | Consulting |
|---|---|---|
| Coaching is the art and practice of enabling individuals and groups to move from where they are to where they want to be | Consulting is bringing expertise to analyze a situation and give expert guidance, advice and recommendations | |
| Trained to work with functioning clients | Trained to work with mental illness | Trained in an area or areas of specialized knowledge |
| Views both parties and relationship as creative, resourceful and whole. Does not diagnose or treat | More apt to view clients and relationship from a medical model. Diagnoses and treats | |
| Emphasis on present and future | Emphasis on past and present | Emphasis on present and future |
| Focus on evolving and manifesting potential | Focus on healing and understanding | Focus on change and improvement |
| Works with clients that are able to form an alliance with each other, and have common goals | Works with clients with entrenched problems | Does needs assessment. Listens for problem-solution |
| Solution oriented | Problem oriented | Solution oriented |
| Coach and clients on peer basis | Hierarchical difference between therapists and client | Consultant is advisor |
| Plan designed by coach and clients together | Treatment plan largely designed by therapist | Plan designed by consultant |
| Co-active approach | Therapist is the "expert" | Consultant has expertise |
| Explore actions and behaviors that manifest high self-esteem | Explore origins of behaviors that create low self esteem | |
| Considers negative self-beliefs as temporary obstacles and coaches client forward | Analyze and treat origins and historical roots of negative self-beliefs | |
| Coach and client ask: What's next, what now? | Therapist and client ask: Why and from where? | |
| Works mainly with external issues | Works mainly with internal issues | |
| Accountability and action between appointments viewed as important | Accountability less commonly expected | |
| Contact between sessions is expected for accountability and to celebrate wins | Contact between sessions for crisis and difficulties only | |
| Uses coaching skills | Uses coaching skills | Uses coaching skills |
| Great questioning and listening skills, asking, goal setting taking responsibility, accountability, testing assumptions reframing, relating, contributing, business acumen | Listening and diagnosis | Listening, problem solving, analyzes, expertise, experience execution |
| Client decides agenda and coach manages agenda | Therapist decides agenda | Consultant does needs analysis and owns agenda |
Source: Fundamentals of Organization & Relationship Systems Coaching, Corporate Learning Solutions Group/Columbia Business School, CCCP and Exitplanning.com
Both disciplines can be working with fully functioning individuals, couples and families who are facing difficult situations. Both professions focus on helping people make changes and accomplish goals that really matter to them.
| Relationship Coaching | Therapy |
|---|---|
| Uses a Discovery Session | Uses a Diagnostic Interview/History |
| Uses many skills similar to therapy | Uses many techniques similar to coaching skills |
| Works with clients’ whole life: work, family, individual | Works with clients’ whole life: work, family, individual |
| May work with emotional material | Often works with emotional material |
Source: Fundamentals of Organization & Relationship Systems Coaching, Corporate Learning Solutions Group/Columbia Business School, CCCP and Exitplanning.com
I will refer a client to a therapist or bring a therapist in when:
- One or more of the clients have an active mental illness (depression, acute anxiety etc.) or a substance abuse problem
- The relationship is characterized by emotional or physical abuse or threats of abuse
- The clients are unable to align on desired goals and outcomes
- The is a presence of a power imbalance between the clients that compromises one or more of the client’s ability to be fully present and expressed in the coaching
- I feel who I’m coaching is outside of the limits of my competency
- The clients show no movement towards their stated goals
Q2. When should our family start planning for succession?
Now. Studies have shown it can take up to 10 years to prepare for and accomplish a successful succession. On the logistical side, the right roles needed to be filled with competent people who can implement the processes and procedures so the company runs smoothly when the founder is not there.
It may require both family and non family members who have the correlating strengths and unique abilities to succeed in these roles. Strength assessments and leadership development will secure your leadership team.
Relationships established by the founder must be strengthened with other key people so the relational equity is preserved.
Legal and accounting preparations will make sure key people will stay through the transition and that the opportunities are maximized whether you choose to keep the company within the family or sell.
The family will be preserved if communication is shared, everyone is included in the dialogue and there is a common understanding of how the business will transition.
Research tell us business transitions fail in business families because:
- 60 % = breakdown in communication and trust within the family
- 25% = heirs unprepared for required roles & responsibilities
- 10% = lack of family mission and vision
- 5% = other causes
So this is another case of failure to plan means planning to fail.
Q3. What does a facilitator do?
I help families establish new processes for communication which reduces assumptions, misunderstandings and conflict. I meet the family where they are at and discover what’s working well, what their vision is, what the obstacles are and recommend solutions to strengthen and support the family. Sometimes this may be helping rising generations grow and develop into their current and future role. It may also be helping families set up effective, ongoing communication with structure and support so all members feel heard and there is a shared understanding about future plans.